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Tasty Mystery Baskets of Clips
You want me to open a store. You want me to sell everything.
- Do it. - Do it?
This is not a good look for me!
At least he can cook, Mom.
"Oh, My God, You Came In Your Pants."
I'm going to fuck you so hard. It's gonna kick ass!
He might be an idiot savant...
Yeah, everyone goes swimming, when they're fucking six.
- I am... Shut up. - How does that happen?
For you I'm willing
Suck it up
"Oh, My God, You Came In Your Pants."
Your dms now
Oh, my God! Are you kidding?
Yeah, not since I was 10.
Okay. Well, check this out.
We're gonna need mo milk
they just plain straight up have no clue how to talk to women.
Okay, hold up.
simonurankles and hayleyurankles and casiaurankles and marleysdeadurankles and reikiurankles and snoksnokfunctionurankles and upanddownwiththepressurehospitalurankles and taylorswifturankles and christmashospitalurankles
- Wow. - Honey...
...the more pot I could ultimately smoke.
Po Po Po Po Power with Bearglove
Hey man Got a big box of
# When the moon #
Hope you have a big trunk B'CUZ IM puttin my bike in it
You know what, you should come by sometime if you want, you know...
and we didn't think you have the balls to do it yourself.
Well, instead of having intercourse, you could have outer-course.
all of this right here? Premeditated, podnah
It's like this. When I was growing pot, I realized...
Dude, here it is.
That I can’t do
I just want to get drunk, fucked up, and make some trades.
Jeremy I love titties !!
Is it safe to come in, or are you guys doing it?
We get there, and, you know, we think it's gonna be awesome...
In the bath?
Yeah, right.
I'll take it
Look at me. Looks are not important. Really look at me.
go plant that seed, man.
How much of the medicine have you taken, sir?
No, you know what, it's a personal choice...
I'm going to put you out on the floor full time.
When someone calls & continues to blame you for their actions
You think?
Yeah, right.
Sixteen.
Plant it with your finger.
Hey hey hey motherfuckah
- You're not looking at me. - Yes, you're pretty.
No.
- Your hands are on my belt. - What?
Hey, Joe. Hey, Sara. How you doing?
Both of you all niggers.
- Sounds good. - Yeah.
Tackle Drunk bitches
- Oh, God! - You are. You're a hot grandma.
Really, that's...
Man, she just gave me her number.
I want to know everything about you.
Tomorrow Niggas
I'm so tired.
# Let the sunshine in #
I love the fact that you're a grandmother.
Trish. No!
Fuckin French Toast
What? You never told me that before.
To all the Trumpskis who are ok with lifting Russian sanctions Siberia seeks breeders
continuing to assert your dominance after waking up
doing things that are illegal in Alabama.
It was really giving it to her.
Caitlin Clark!
Life’s about spirit. And passion. And connections.
Do you want me to be fucking retarded?
- I almost feel guilty. - No, you don't.
You gotta see this through the eyes of a woman, you know?
BETTY COCKER
But when are you gonna tell her?
WINTER GOT ME LIKE
Do I say, "Hey, Jay, do you want a Slurpee? You want a Slurpee?"
Fantastic Maps Temple Dungeons
Weekend quarantine plans be like
I want to do whatever you want to do, okay?
It really is….
I actually think he might be, like, some genius...
Andy, come on. We were just kidding.
I don't want to cram pimpage
Here be david Caruso in Jade
No, I didn't, but...
Hope you have a big trunk because I'm putting my bike in it.
Are you free?
Smoke my pole
No! Kelly Clarkson!
What about you? You're used to, like, a really big city.
Po Po Po Po Power with BEARGLOVE!!!
I don't even know who I am. All I know is...
Well, then, that's the only hobby you don't have.
It's just about time I got really dirty.
Because women do not care about what you have to say...
you know, he's a big dork...
Watch your mouth. And cut your grass better.
You called me a Brute
I want to touch your big, fat noodle...
- Right. - Not after fucking brunch.
"I am a seventh-degree imperial yo-yo master."
Especially from our Guatemalan gardener, Javier.
You just got fucked up with him.
I don't actually sell anything here. I just sell them on eBay.
I just don't want to have an erection anymore.
Okay, I can't listen to anymore of this, 'cause it's making me sick.
This weekend?
Hdhd
Oh, my God!
and a relationship, and laughing and cuddling and all that shit.
- Take your porn with you. - I'm not taking it.
Mmm-hmm. Yeah. Beggin for a peggin, I wrote that.
No I’m not.
How about 15?
# The age of Aquarius #
Are you done? Listen.
But...
I want to touch your big, fat noodle.
I'm not joking.
I’d tap that Oh yeah? You’d “tap that”?
- What does this look like? - A vagina.
Give it a shot.
When I was young, I tried, and it didn't happen.
You know I want to fuck you hard! Yeah!
Hey hey hey motherfuuucker
It was a very bad night.
You know how I know you’re gay?
- That guy needs to get laid. - Tell me something I don't know.
And now I’m making your pink barcode blue…
Oh, you're Jalen me. Cool
Why did you cheat on her?
and it's pain and it's... You know, you lose weight...
Yeah, let's go!
Just stop calming me down and tell me what I should do.
Sex acts, right? Things that my wife won't do, okay?
You know what, he ain't going to do it willingly.
Why? Because he's never had a relationship.
Aye, Aye Co-Captain yellow shirts
Trust me on this one, all right?
This is three grown ass men, don't nobody want to hear that shit.
Po Po Po Po Power with Bearglove
To everyone who said they are leaving When Trump wins
Hello.
It really is….
who you fuck.
Popopopopopo with old spice
Okay. Great.
Jennifer told me how to fuck. It's going to kick ass.
11 x 643 = 5717
What is the "pussy on a pedestal" thing?
- Hi, Trish. - Hey.
You blind someone with that box.
Thinking about you this morning. You're gonna Kick Ass
Sucks Motherfucker
Now you being condescending.
Pull out slowly and go straight ahead.
to get the brochure that she requested.
- That is so unfair. - I'm gonna head out.
You’re the Bitch, Bitch!
This is the Dawning of the age of adoption
Listen, it's really important because...
THANK YOU RYAN AND
It’s gonna be real, real colorful Are you free?
You should go.
When you gift a noob your old Drake mags
Cool it with the kino
- It was a disaster. - Really?
oh it's happening beauty
Dude, you totally... Oh, shit, I gotta go. Damn.
Here's my number. So...
I want to have lots of sexy sex with you.
You're officially not a virgin.
Thank you so much for bringing it to me.
- You ready? - Yup.
Wow. That totally worked!
So, you actually wrote that one girl looked like...
So you're gay, now?
She had a dick, man!
This is my baby. That's my baby's dick.
I want to fuck you I want to fuck your ass
THITH ITH GONNA KICK…ASSSSSSSSSSTTTTHHHHHH
I always say
Congratulations, man. That is great.
Hey, don’t be a negro. Be my $NGA
Within one hour, you'll each have 20 dates.
It's not about butthole pleasures at all. OK Sport, keep telling yourself that.
and you are trying to make me sell them and I don't want to.
I like your sweater, does that come in a V neck?
you know, there are certain things...
weirded out about it. Then it really didn't happen...
kl,klmko
Fuck you!
Well, I just... Wait a minute, I thought you hated him.
So, you want me to take her?
Can you see my nostrils?
Check the expiration date because they were from when I was married.
You know, you could have sex.
Dude, teach me.
everyone to buzz lightyear in lightyear 2022:
You gotta highlight your attributes, like a diamond in the rough.
- So, okay. - All right.
Hope you have a big trunk Cause I’m gonna put my sauce in it
That’s The Second Time I’ve Heard That.
This is going to be bad.
My girlfriend, Jill, found your speed-dating card.
Fuck it. "Pussy" is a scientific word.
Yeah, me, too.
you were looking for a recession? recession here now
I dated this girl...
WINTER GOT ME LIKE
I should have hired a 300-pound guy...
All right, ninja master.
Can I help you?
Todays forecast: dark and cloudy Chance of suicide bomb
Look, you still covering my shift on Friday or what?
I am so sorry, I didn't tell you I had kids.
She was "Hurtin' for a squirtin?"
Do me, yo-yo master.
'Cause if the thing is that important, you can't just stop.
Because I'm insecure You can't tell?
Are you fine?
I hope you have a big trunk cause i'm gonna put my boards in it.
You know what, guys...
There she is, in the bookstore. You should ask her out, man.
I was a little reticent to come over and talk to you.
GO Plant that seed, man.
You need to get past that...
Oh, my God, you came in your pants.
It just does... This doesn't feel right.
You see that whole Teen Wolf thing you got going right there?
Oh, my God, your Penis is Huge!
I would totally pay people to have him killed.
Me so horny Me so stupid
Sundy be like
I'm going to kill everyone in the store...
Wow, that's...
- Yes, I am. - Yeah.
I have 47 of them.
I like your sweater. Does that come in a V-neck?
Let me ask you that.
God, I've been looking for that speed-dating card.
It wasn't that good for me.
We fucked dwarfs in the ass.
Me so stupid!
Is that a serious question?