Tasty Mystery Baskets of Clips

- I don't even like fudge. - Great.

and you're divorcing him.

We are gonna dominate caroling this year.

Whatever, I just can't keep up

I ruined Christmas.

I'm gonna let your lazy shenanigans

[inhales deeply] Hmm...

a princess outfit at least once a month.

So it's a date, then. I'll see you tonight.

[Charles Jones singing "Be Your Santa Claus"]

[tires screeching]

Oh, mom, look, look, look. She's got wine.

isn't for everybody.

in my pants, I gotta say.

and feeding each other sandwiches

or if that's just something that I'm dreaming about right now.

with my own mother.

My daughter really wants

I am so sorry. I forgot to te...

about our relationship.

[instrumental music]

Oh, honestly, have at it.

Oh, um, do you want me to reach down there

♪ You know I got to tell you girl ♪

Guys, I can't believe that we're eating Chinese food

at Our Mother of Perpetual Suffering.

What? No. That's not convenient.

This is gonna get ugly.

like this until you beat the shit out of her.

[music continues]

Okay, time for bed, my darlings.

Yeah. Oh, of course you do. Are you kidding me?

[indistinct chatter]

- Yikes. I just bought all this. - And the canned goods.

(Kiki) Okay, guys.

take off their clothes!

business opportunity.

- Oh! - Ladies, I love you.

I-I wanted a mellow Christmas

- Thank you for visiting, Amy! - Bye.

♪ Good tidings we bring ♪

Guys, how long have you been standing here?

But he's completely under her control.

- Oh, good Lord. Really, mom? - Thanks, grandma.

- That's an antique! - It's a hideous tree, mother!

Just go for it, dude.

going with some dads from school.

Yes, why am I responsible

Fine, but you need to have

And then my husband died

And you know what, I have done horrible stuff

You know what my son gave me last year for Christmas?

♪ The glad glad news ♪

um, would you be willing to come with me

to have a life that's separate from mine.

It's Christmas Eve.

- What flight? - Oh, I didn't tell you?

and you give fancy parties, and you know how to cook food.

- God. - Oh, my God.

- Nice to see you again. - How you doin'?

You know, every time

- Amy, it's Christmas. - Mother, get out!

They would have been happier

- How fun was that sledding? - Oh, that was fun.

Amy, it's December 19th.

I don't know, I-I kind of like it.

[Sandy sneezing]

- Why, why not? - Because I need space.

It's so nice to meet you.

and she can't handle it.

- ♪ Baby how you feelin'? ♪ - ♪ Feeling good as hell ♪

- You have no idea! - It's not even real snow!

I want to celebrate my triumphant return to Chicago.

I used to have one just like it.

Okay, alright, that's great.

♪ Candles burnin' low ♪

I-it actually really was.

Such a good sport.

♪ Hey hey yeah yeah yeah ♪

She's a 62-year-old woman, so...

And then you started dating that weird dude

Okay, good. That was good.

if we're gonna win the Caroling Cup this year.

Well, my daughter didn't kick me out of the house or anything.

There is something that I'm very excited about

And all those things made your mom

We are mothers.

♪ Like that ♪

And then, we're gonna come home

♪ L-O-V-E ♪♪

Yes, you are dicking around.

I'd, I'd wax your balls for free.

♪ Every kiss begins with Kay ♪♪

Thank you so much.

It's-it's about the fact that I'm a 34-year-old woman

Like the terrorist organization.

and we became crazy close.

♪ We wish you a merry Christmas ♪

- Oh, yeah! Yeah! - Nice to meet you.

- You want that? - No, thank you.

But sometimes, she can be a bit much.

- You know that. - I do.

Hank, I am Amy's mother

- Maybe next time. - Okay.

And then you fell off your bike and you broke your arm.

I'm gonna go back to Bismarck where I belong.

Merry Christmas, lady. Merry Christmas.

Oh, gosh. I don't know, babe.

Here, have some X-Boxes.

Let go! Let go!

I honestly think that he's... the one.

- ♪ Do something wild ♪ - ♪ Whoo ♪

- Yeah. - You guys wanna play dodgeball?

Oh, you're definitely getting the gold-star treatment tonight.

We're best friends.

Oh, my fucking God.

which one of these Sexy Santas

So I checked it out on Zillow and I made an all-cash offer.

It's much easier to do it this way.

- Yeah! Oh. - Because I don't.

♪ We'll have driven through the night ♪

So I was thinking Christmas Eve, if that's convenient.

Take your little flute and shoo! Shoo, fly.

Let's get these out of the way.

- Merry Christmas! - Merry Christmas!

- I need you to get out. - Amy.

- We love you back. - Same here.

I wouldn't want to impose.

Yeah, we're new friends.

- ♪ I wanna be your Santa Claus ♪ - ♪ Wanna be your Santa Claus ♪

And she is a pain in the ass even on a good day.

because I think she wants to steal my TV.

What are you talking about?

You're wrinkling my pajamas.

I got it, but we play. We play.

until my friends come over for dinner

♪ Merry Christmas baby ♪♪

Oh, my God, that's like 50 more vaginas.

♪ Oh yeah ♪

But I guess not everyone is as incredibly strong as I am.

♪ If he don't love you anymore ♪

When you came over to the house last week

What are you doing in here?

- Is that okay? - Yeah.