Tasty Mystery Baskets of Clips

♪ Christmas ♪

- The key, shorty. - Okay, first of all, fuck you!

I wasn't the worthless piece of shit everybody else thinks I am.

Hang on a second here.

♪ Shepherds quake at the sight ♪

- This ain't no strip joint. - What a fucking Sokes family.

Well, I'm proud to say that my pussy is color-blind, so you never know.

- Oh, oh, fuck me. I'm so dirty. - Yeah.

I'm Davis, you're Cook. End of fucking story.

Think she knows?

We're going to Mexico.

Don't even think about it, Willie.

You've seen them babies with beer bellies.

♪ Tis the season to be jolly Fa la la la la la la la la ♪

Well, if you wanna be scientific, yeah, I guess so.

You need a tic tac

Ho, ho! Come on, you got Jesus and the lambikins watching over you,

- Shit. How'd you get that? - He tapped that security girl.

- Let's go, come on! - I'm on it.

Not a chance. Nah, this chassis' built to last.

Are you off of your goddamn nut? Is that what you do?

♪ Sleep in heavenly peace ♪

Son, this bus goes to the Arrowhead Premium Outlets.

Or I won't let it hit me in the ass. Whatever the fuck it is.

Fuck me like the dirty little slut that I am.

- But, Willie... - No "but, Willie." Goddamn it!

- That's it. We're cutting him out. - What? Fuck no.

You, me. Before I fucked it all up.

That big bitch is mine.

- Well, you don't know shit, then, do you? - Hey, listen, before we had midget...

We power it down, we have ten minutes before it reboots.

I guess the abortion didn't take.

And pure shit on a good day.

Hey, Shaft, you ready to stick it to this chick tonight?

Fine. I'll give you a second chance. If you give me a chance to help you.

But I've worn the suit enough to know a perfect Christmas gift when I see one.

I mean, the one time your son of a bitch father

I bet that pussy got lips like an orangutan.

Please don't make me picture that. I'm on it.

- Don't do that. - Oh, that's for me.

Make it ten, and I'll let you do that thing with my shoe.

And while they're rolling their fat asses down here,

They have Hungry Hoagies there too.

♪ Right outside my door ♪

♪ With a corn cob pipe and a button nose And two eyes made of out coal ♪

You know, I smoked two packs of menthols a day,

Come on, shitstick. Bring it on home to Mama.

- Where at? - Chi-Town.

are you a complete fucking retard?

- With no teeth, he ought to try dudes. - Terrible.

Spare some change.

If I cut ties with every numbnut who tried to shoot me,

has hallucinogenic aftereffects if you eat too much of it.

- And how are you supposed to get it? - You mean, how are we supposed to get it?

I know we left on bad terms.

- Grand Theft Auto V. - Nah, I don't care.

Well, I ain't afraid of you, bitch! I'll blow a hole through your ass so...

Whoa! You go, little sperm. Get up in there.

Ow! Goddamn, kid! Fuck!

Welcome to the shit show.

Uh, I do have a gingerbread man costume in a child's large, if you prefer.

- Cutting her out after the grab. Right? - Yeah, yeah. We're good.

Fine! If it's an emergency, call me, all right?

Clitoris, son. Do it for Mama.

You're part of the family now.

♪ I just can't wait till Christmas day ♪

- Merry Christmas. - Yeah.

That way, you don't wake up wondering why you got oatmeal in your carpet.

Meantime, we wear the suit, hit the pavement,

- Tell me it's fucking dirty! - Okay, it's fucking dirty.

Hell if I know, I ain't his fucking secretary.

That guy never rocked a clit in his life.

I never would've gotten pregnant with you.

'Tis the season of giving!