Tasty Mystery Baskets of Clips

then you're talking about something.

And without further ado, I would like to introduce our choirmaster, Renee.

You know how caramels make Mama belch. Remember?

with that diseased-ass dick of yours.

Okay, I'll go. But this package came to my house for you, Willie.

or wanna show me pictures of her fucking vacation.

- What about the alarm system? - It's a Centaur 2100.

I did it once, but it felt weird.

- Get in! - You get in!

Merry fucking Christmas.

- Time? - Concert starts in five.

You look like a fucking albino scarecrow.

You picked that douche bag up when you were sober?

goes to this A-hole at the top.

Oh, oh, yes! Oh, oh, yes! Yes, oh, come get there.

Then you should go home, like I told you to start with.

Fuck me, Santa!

For the kids. I won't piss on the suit. I really won't.

It's just a semi. Don't get all bent out of shape.

And second of all, what in the fuck is he doing here?

I'm a soprano. My friend Ronnie says I sound like Mariah Carey.

'Cause I'm pretty sure crabs can jump. All right?

and then punishes you because you were naughty.

kicked him out of the hotel and the ejaculate conception

- The bag goes with me. - You mean with us.

I knew I should've left, second I saw your miserable fucking face.

All right, big shot. You can stay out here with your GD flask.

Maybe next time, you'll feel comfortable speaking.

And she's a mean fucking bitch, so don't go getting any ideas, all right?

Oh, yeah? Well, joke's on you because my wife died six months ago. Boom!

The midget. He tried to kill you once. I'm not gonna give him a second chance.

Okay, feed the kids. Come on. Give it up.

He heard "Pop That Pussy" in the vent, and that is a big fucking deal.

Hey, Di. Is it the midget that's fully proportional?

- What'd you think? I was just hatched? - Well, where were you born?

A hundred. Or I'm gonna carry my ass outta this old piece of a room right now.

You know what, just kind of stay in this section right here, okay?

- Can you crack the safe? - Of course I can crack the fucking safe.

Oh, well, if we're being honest, I don't like being lied to.

♪ Frosty the Snowman Was a jolly happy soul ♪

Drop the weapon! Get down!

Of course you may have to make the first move,

I found out the hard way once when I messed with my own kind.

Willie? It's me, Thurman.

but he was clueless enough to think

He's home-schooled.

Think about somebody besides your fucking selves.

What? Call the police!

Well, he'd get panic attacks. It was embarrassing.

- Nothing else? Shit. - The guy's a ghost.

Fuck! Oh! Get out of my brain!

That asshole Regent ended up getting busted

You a woman of high standards,

You got smaller.

- And another fucking corner. - Stop it, Willie.

- Cough medicine. - Let me see that.

Now listen, don't be sitting on any toilet seats.

But you gotta understand, it was only business.

But you're still my Santa.

Because I can. Wouldn't be the first time.

That's the ugliest fucking baby on the planet.

♪ Christmas, Christmas ♪

Can't you see I'm trying to eat a fucking pizza here?

up to the brim, every day.

- Merry Christmas. - Yeah, whatever.

♪ Silent night ♪

I'll break it down, all right.

- Shot put. Olympic alternate. - Nice.

Well, bless your heart. Cheap little fucker.

Oh, here he comes.

Wait, bring up my office, I wanna see the safe.

Christmas in general gets me so drenched.

Po Po Po Po Power with Bearglove

Look at this, this is not so bad. Look, you got bunk beds.

She liked the job I had at the time, especially while I was in uniform.

♪ Well, it's Christmas time, pretty baby ♪

I don't know about that.

Well, it must've been packed to the gills

♪ Shake it to the east, baby Shake it all night ♪

I'm telling you, if it had a butt, he'd try to fuck it.

For four weeks.

I also found what was the closest thing I ever had to an actual girlfriend.

Who gives a shit? As long as she doesn't get in the way.

- Chair? - Chair!

And I broke that sacred bond. It's not an excuse.

♪ Gee, the traffic is terrific ♪

No, seriously. I did get you a gift.

If you gotta take a shit just stand over it, couple of feet away,

- I hadn't gotten 'tussed up in a while. - Yeah.

- Will we have Christmas together? - Fuck, I don't know.

Life sucks a big, giant dick, kid.

I don't mean to be indiscreet, but I do pretty well.

Well, you talk like you have a cock in your mouth, shitstick.

♪ Whoa, it's Christmas time, pretty baby ♪

What are you, a fucking game show host or something?

You know fucking well you did.