Tasty Mystery Baskets of Clips

Can you give me a hint?

Oh, yeah, baby. Tornado.

Oh, my God, really?

- Great. - Great.

I'm a magician, not a wizard. You and your gay Harry Potter.

Why are you doing that? Why are you doing that?

You can't deny that going to Hogwarts wouldn't be life-changing.

- Oh, did you, now? - Yeah.

God, you're such a girl. Come on, it's my treat.

Did you get her an engagement gift?

We are farmers, bum-pa-dum-bum-bum-bum-bum. Call 1-800-604-7892 today.

and this gets way more Christian.

It's like the '70s in here.

- There are a million guys in ties. - So look for the guy I'm standing next to.

See, all I wanted to do was have sex with you. Remember?

It was your dad. Greatest man I ever met.

- So what? - It's embarrassing.

Okay, I'm sorry. I gotta go.

- Dylan. - Enough! I'm not talking about it.

It just, I don't know, feels a little collegey.

We need to talk.

I'm sorry. I didn't...

Oh, no. Excuse me. Sorry.

Three kids. Christof, Karlina and Pepijn.

- What did you say? - For Montauk this weekend.

- Pants. - Shirt.

We managed to actually stay friends.

A, B, C, D, E, F, G, H, I, J, K, L, M, N, O, P...

Actually, never really taken anyone up here.

Why do relationships always start off so fun and then turn into suck-a-bag-o-dicks?

And because you're just my buddy, I can tell you

I'm done. How was I?

Wow. This looks normal.

- A real girl? - Yeah.

But it's just sex.

- Thanks, man. You're really nice. - All right. Hey, safe travels.

- Okay. Thanks, guys. - Welcome, Dylan.

I was sleeping standing up.

It was dumb, man. Something I saw in a management book.

Yeah, a lot of people would say longer than that.

Right. Can I ask you a huge favor?

keieieuej? what do you want kdidieu? feed the keepsakeryals! whaap! whaap! betrayal keepsake! betrayal keepsake! ksksisi kdkdkdsksk! thank you keieiei kdkdkdk! you're welcome keieeueu ksosksisosodkdjd!

Okay. You want someone to sweep you off your feet,

Have a great night, baby.

yes beryl troixerette? what do you want? i want to do some hzuaywing in hacketts gully.

- You're picking me up from the airport. - Hi. Yes, I am.

who's filling in for jayne sheely? jayne hulme.

Not as much as I love you.

Every place can be a bit lonely sometimes.

Why is your dick so big

I don't know, you think maybe I keep my worlds apart for some crazy reason?

Well, I do have a thing for jerks.

- Dude, no. - Why not?

My eyes are covered. I don't know what you're doing.

Get the hell out of here.

We can tear this shit up.

So was it an easy move?

- No, no, no. - Shut up. It's not what you think.

- Was it your dog? - No. Never had one.

It's a physical act. Like playing tennis.

She divorced you, Dad.

Sorry, bro. No disrespect. I'm a huge fan.

That he's still that same man to you.

But then he has these moments of real clarity. It's hit or miss.

I liked your eyes. I didn't think I'd ever seen such big, beautiful eyes.

- Can you please explain to me this photo? - That is my 12th-birthday surprise party.

How to wear white pants to a cookout.

- Hey. - A wheelchair. Like I'm an invalid.

- Here. Sorry. - Great. Thanks.

Go to sleep or I'll blow you up like dynamite!!

When my girlfriend wants To suck my dick

Is this about what happened the other night?

I'm not gay, Tommy.

- Count. - I was tied up at work. I'm sorry.

Dylan, you are not gonna shit the bed.

- What do you mean? - We're here.

It's Closing Time, by the band Semisonic!

- Wait, is this a trick? - No.

Have you really never brought a girl home before?

No, no. Please, come in, come in. Thank you.

Well, me and God.

It was Times Roman.

Hey. Hold on, hold on.

- Like on Oprah! - Exactly.

- It doesn't matter, it's over. - Why?

- I'm sure. - Okay.

Can I get two gyro number sixes, extra sauce?

- Do you feel manly now? - I do.

- Use the ladder! - I have a fear of heights!

You're better than that.

Really? Come on, Jamie.

You seem like you've got it totally together,

What are you trying to do? Dig your way to China?

All that matters is how you look at him.

What? You said that he was Greek.

YOU’RE MEN YOU LIKE SPORTS

And then when the sex stopped, invite you to LA for the weekend

Because we were drunk.

- No, I didn't fucking blink. - Blinked again.

Can you imagine someone who would actually say that?

I just need you to be my friend right now.

Yeah, I didn't really think this through.

- It's kind of funny. - It's kind of funny.

Why does it always gotta come with complications?

It's your offer.

batiks would work on the waterslides to make them go faster. yes the wood would grip onto the flumes and give a 8888888X speed boost.

L-O-M-B-A-R-D. Lots Of Money But A Real Dullard.

My first order of business, lighter doors.

'cause it's against the law.

Fine. I'll go next.

Yep. But I'll take that over him sexting his friends any day.

Put your pants on Your urinating

- You're buying. - What?

Jamie, no, no, no, no, no, wait. They take this shit seriously, okay?

- Can you get to him? - He's still in the first year of his contract,

Smart, empathetic. Far superior to men in every way.

got dysentry boing with her toxkids and snok snok (but don't tell shabani she'll rip maxine off!) yes boing boing and my retired grandkids yes boing boing with the snok snok birds to that "boing boing?" yes and me snooker tables and great grandpa snell's got dengee fever no wonder he grow exclusive talons and with his snokkids yes boing boing with fancy slorouroot

He had a stutter. It got real bad when he was nervous.

I just let her go.

Okay, all right, you big baby.

- What happened? - Nothing. He was just blah.

You're not exactly what comes to mind when you think headhunter.

Great, 'cause feet gross me out. Daddy issues.

This here is Dylan. He's from LA.

Don't laugh. This could be great.

Hey! We were waiting for you.

I'm sorry, I don't smoke.

Hey, maybe the guy's married or something.

When I was eight, that time in Vermont. We got snowed in with the ski instructor.

Listen, I know this is probably a no because all you do is work like a dull boy,