Tasty Mystery Baskets of Clips

Are you sure I had my teeth this morning?
Will you take a lie-detector test?
Okay.
[PEOPLE LAUGHING]
You know what I mean?
[SIGHS]
But this is crazy, you know? I know it. I know it.
Any other judge would have let you out, but this guy,
Arthur.
What are you doing, judge? Jerking me off, here?
If he's allowed to go free,
Arthur, you're talking crazy now. You don't know he's guilty.
No, sir, I'm not trying to make a deal.
Why me, fellas? Come on.
He's all right. He just needs a little time, that's all.
And I fully intend to have that proven in a court of law.
GUARD 2: Come on, Kirkland. Let's go.
You're the one that put me through law school.
You're gonna find yourself representing a sacrificial lamb.
I just borrowed it for the night, and now how am I gonna tell him?
And ladies and gentlemen of the jury,
[LAUGHS]
and I tell you, I can't find five people out there
RAYFORD: Order in the courtroom. BAILIFF: Do what I say.
because you hate him so much, right?
Hi, Mr. Kirkland. Nice to see you. ARTHUR: How are you today?
Last week, we went for a ride in the car. Remember?
Because during sex,
You're a wonderful man, Grandpa.
On the basis of this report,
SALTZMAN: What kind of world do we live in?
[CHATTER ON POLICE RADIO]
Mr. Kirkland...
To say, you know... To wave to her, to say hello.
Yeah.
No.
Anything I tell you, you know?
So he pleads guilty even though he's innocent.
Now, sit down. I've got a lot of work to do.
I'm aware that I'm not particularly, uh, well-liked.
Why don't you ease up on the judge?
Well, now we know they're definitely safe.
She lets go of that purse, I'm on my way.
Only it's not that simple.
[WOMAN SCREAMS]
The son of a bitch is guilty!
on people's lives. Wait a minute.
Do you honestly think that...?
How are you? Good to see you.
Uh, I'm Arthur Kirkland. You wanted to see me?
Firemen trying to get me out of the car. I'm trapped because some son...
Arthur... Gail, on my life?
I find the defendant, Ronald Wenke, guilty.
I mean, we are so opposite,
[SCREAMS]
RAYFORD: Mr. Kirkland, you are out of order.
You say, Pass the salt.
Mr. Kirkland. Damn it, Arthur!
Fleming got me crazy. You push Fleming
Patient?
That's not the point.
I said, Oh. Sounded like, Go.
[WARREN & JAY LAUGHING]
He pushes me aside,
Your Honor, Mr. Foreman,
And he was too busy.
No. Not at all.
The honorable Francis Rayford presiding.
RAYFORD: Here, let me show you something.
Make sure the judge sees it, okay?
We're not going after anyone, Mr. Kirkland. We are simply...
I've been a lawyer for 12 years.
Oh, I see. Yeah, yeah.
What the hell are you doing?
He forgot to bring it.
Hey, listen to me, Jeff.
The judge is guilty Wait a minute.
[COUGHS]
I mean, he killed kids. You see?
Why would she lie?
Hi. Hi, Sherry.
Oh, they're just having some fun with him, that's all.
I can't get anything from anybody. I'll see you later.
Let's just get you to the hospital, get you checked out.
from a lot of corrupt lawyers, is what we're doing.
Your Honor, in light of the fact that this is the defendant's first major offense,
Sweetheart, give him the pictures.
A defense lawyer has to defend people who are guilty.
No, he doesn't drink. Doesn't drink at all.
Hang somebody for armed robbery. Try it.
who are willing to believe that I'm innocent. Not five of them.
What about this guy here?
Were you in love? No.
So, uh, what's new? Heh, heh.
How'd you know there was one, Ralph?
Put that thing away. What's going on?
Look at that. Ha, ha, ha.
Centerfold. Lawyer of the Month.
I'm placing you on probation for one year.
Nothing. I don't have to do anything.
Don't quote the law. My client is innocent.
[ALL LAUGHING]
GAIL: Jesus. Sounds pretty bad.
Will the defendant please rise?
Why? Polygraph is not admissible evidence.
Tell you the punchline. You're gonna love this.
Arthur, the committee is doing something about what's going on.
Got anything to say?
It depends. He comes, he goes.
Well, you mean, we're not gonna make it back?
I know that. That's right.
[BOTH LAUGHING]
[CHUCKLES]
Sam, I love you.
Nothing can be done. Now, I don't buy that, judge.
Now, that's true, because I don't.
I don't pretend to be a voice of authority.
With you, it's still new and exciting.
And other stuff too.
wanted in Alabama for assault with a deadly weapon.
PRISONER 3: Don't put that in here. Chick ain't my type.
[WARREN & JAY LAUGHING]
Here. No, wait, wait, wait.
Do you know what that's about? Yeah.