Tasty Mystery Baskets of Clips

BUSYBODIES?! THEY'VE GOTTA BE DEALTH WITH, FRANK!

Who could do something like this?

My teenage years studying ballet are well known.

I'm fine thank you.

No, I mean which one do you wanna watch first?

No luck recovering that password then? "It's just the one game password I forgot..."

I want to ask you, would you read a homily at Sunday Service?

Upon discovering she was about to sell up to the developers,

CRUSTY FAIRINGS

Look I can assure you that it wasn’t my intention to upset the apple cart

alt alt alt CHANGE THE FUCKING RECORD

And what about Tim Messenger? What was his crime?

You can arrest us if you like.

Nicholas, Nicholas, Nicholas.

We haven't got long.

Morning, Angle.

It's just the one girlfriend, Actually

We like to let them think they run the place.

I’m a slasher

Must have hit the sign at some speed. Took the whole top off.

- ...decaffeinated? - Decaffeinated?

Do feel free to spool through.

- Why are you dressed like a police officer? - Because I am one?

Maybe It’s time to give it up sir

Unless there's anything you're unclear about?

Oh, Authenticate, Authenticate, Authenticate. Change The Fucking Record.

in a lovely little place that I think has won Village of the Year

So what’s on tap? Birthday rave?

It's the raffle with a very special guest presenter.

who's filling in for mike leishman? mellor marks.

operate the vehicle removal service for the council?

I think I have a cream for that.

- Head them off? - Fuck, yeah.

I dunno… Pub?

Yes, thank you.

Change the f**king record!

How can this be for the greater good?

No, I'm... I'm...

Because "accident" implies there's nobody to blame.

And the next name is...

Yeah, you do your job and we'll do ours, eh?

Three people have died in a week.

Nasty way to go

"Drive safe. " Oh, my God.

Stealing biscuits is.... wrong?

Don't go being a twat now.

- Pint of lager, please, Mary. - Right you are, my love.

- I'm Roy Porter. This is my wife Mary. - Mary.

- Terrible speller. - Oh, yeah?

Being a woman has nothing to do with it.

My pens runnin' out Not a problem

- In 20 years or so, yes. - Well done, you.

- No, it isn't. - No, it isn't.

- Yes, sir? - That's it.

No luck catching them retards then?

"Local Bobby Gives Thumbs Up To Teen Suicide"?

So, with them having passed on, I decided to sell it on myself

what you up to tonight? I have to water my peace lily...

- Sir, you have to understand... - No, you have to understand.

No luck catching them killers, then?

I just wanna be good at what I do

Well, Mr. Webley, this is an extremely dangerous collection.

and the kiss was the only convincing moment in it.

- Why do we need the dog? - It's not the dog we need.

You’ve been making us teachers look bad

Well, you've got me there.

I'm an addict and must be stopped.

What's the situation? Once BA and a fuckload of slides

Jeffrey epstien was fucking murdered

My my, here come the FAZZ...

Oh I see. That’s fascism.

yes beryl scial are you a member of the priory of sion? yes and monks don't answer to a piano.

It’s a requirement

Maye we should go on the bouncy castle

award winning game

Now, my perfect Sunday would begin with...

- The victims knew each other. - Everyone knows everyone round here.

Proceeded to improve skill base with courses in advanced driving

Do you really think this is murder?

It's all about the greater good.

Achieved the highest arrest record for any officer in the Met.

Nasty way to go.

- You are talking about here? - Nicholas, what do you want?

- Morning, Sergeant. - Morning.

Go back to Lyndon, there's nothing you can do...

THE GREATER GOOD THE GREATER GOOD, PRECISELY.

when I distracted him with the cuddly monkey.

Put a sock in it, town mouse.

No, sorry, you were talking about the offer?

Official vocab guidelines state that "force" is too aggressive.

Pack it in, Kevin, you silly bastard!

He’s a nipper Greg, he’ll come round.

Consumerism, wonderful

When they started the Village of the Year contest,

yes bergumotiontrayalgoopeessetheerelectriceelryl thomshockagumptionseagullpoochocolatewhitrmpsogumptionpiposodroddososoucsssaucsesluiceofforonswitchbrokerette? what do you want? i want to quanter the remperettes in surfers paradwqinse.

It's over, Danny.

Actually, Nicholas, you might as well take a break.

No luck catching those dinosaurs then? It’s just the one dinosaur actually

what's beryl bonk? it's a sacrament.

- PC Thatcher? - Yes, love?

Chief, we've had a report of some hippy types

What you thinking Tilly?

Danny, believe me, it's not something you ever get used to.

He thinks you're talking a load of shit. Swings and roundabouts, isn't it?

TUVIX WAS FUCKING MURDERED

They'll make it disappear. Who are they gonna believe?

The greater good.

its your job isnt it DIRECT!

Greg over there was an extra in Straw Dogs

But it's been impounded as evidence.

What am I going to do with you?

Have you listened to anything That Iv'e said

Dom's start to 2025

Having slipped, and tragically, broken her back

Its just the one hammer actually…

Mr Skinner Dan has broke glass in aisle 6

Hello Elle How's the hand?

But you've always been here.

You know, maybe he's... Maybe he's not alone. Maybe there are others.

- Do you mind if I ask how she died? - Traffic collision.

Why has he got that big coat on?

- Oh, I see. It's "feminism." - feminism. Wonderful.

Oh, Batman, Batman, Batman. Change the fucking record.

Something that placed you at the scene of the crime.

Me when you get angry at me

I'd say that's lunch.

Could I have a glass of cranberry juice, please?

Well, we can't accept gifts from somebody we've officially rebuked. So...

What absolute Horse shit

When you find Alex's Stash of dead pikies

Pack it in Andrea you silly bastard

No luck catching them trains then? Just the hassocks train actually

That was amazing

Immigrants immigrants immigrants

Dad says he's got a child's mind

Well, it's a swan.

That's quite all right, Ms. Kirrilly. Drive safe.

Simon Skinner, I'm arresting you on suspicion of the murder of Leslie Tiller.

See. It's only ever about the job.

Are you saying this is all about winning the Best Village Award?

PC Skinner to the Manager’s Office! Manager’s Office, PC Skinner!

What are you up to tonight? I have to water my peace lily

A great big bushy beard!

Oh, we're already firm friends

What can possibly go wrong

their kiss was the only convincing moment in it.

Get a look at her AAS

You're playing the male lead in a homage to William Shakespeare's

Pack it in Putin you silly bastard

Would Sergeant Angel come to the stage, please?

I'm also arresting you on suspicion of the murder of Tim Messenger on May 1st,

to some folks from the city that Martin, George and Eve,

OH, RICO RICO RICO. CHANGE THE FUCKING RECORD.

our friend, The Living Statue, was here on Saturday.