Tasty Mystery Baskets of Clips

Get that stupid look off your face.

Perhaps you two should get to know each other a little better.

I could not stop. They are coming.

- (Mary hollering) - LAVELLE: That's her song.

LAVELLE: Why not? I got sales experience.

- (grunting) - (rhythmic drumming)

I will be your royal groomer.

Well, no one is asking you to stay.

(entry bell jingles)

These are the foreskins of your forefathers.

(drum and bass play one beat)

why these mashed potatoes is black?

to take care of you.

your soft ass ain't never do nothing like that.

America has certainly changed since our last visit.

- Oh, you'll see. - REEM: Okay, I want y'all

to win the heart of his true love,

for locating one of your lost sperm.

I'll be dead soon.

Now it's time for the main event, young folks.

Hey, Mary, you just gonna leave?

AKEEM: Hello, Babar.

Ah, well, I don't want to shift blame,

- Jabberwocky Joffer. - No.

Yes, Your Majesty.

grazing in a field of horny goat weeds.

- What was that line? - (laughter)

I am King Akeem Joffer, king of Zamunda.

here in this land, conceived during my last visit.

Yeah, but that's not Barbershop.

Uh, he's the reason why the Zamundans migrated

I can't do this shit no more, man. I really can't.

LIVIA: Do the right thing. Go ahead, boy.

if you were in the mood...

Uh, Lisa, I was, uh, wondering,

to find his true love.

Two shots of chilled Cîroc.

Akeem now is an African king.

Which reminds me... St. John's is at the Garden.

And because she's a woman,

So, uh... marriage.

- Put your shoulders back. - Mm-hmm.

Acting mine, that's good.

The McDowell's menu is in no way

I think they get the idea. So, how you doing?

I give you Fresh Peaches and Sugar Cube!

until King Akeem gives me my answer.

- You know? - MARY: Let me tell you something, baby.

You need no other teacher than your king and your father.

when you assume that Semmi had something to do with this.

to solve your problems diplomatically.

I got to get solid.

Good morning, Mother and Father, and happy anniversary.

and then we can, you know, get it crackin'.

The monkey said, "Hey, you bastard, can't you see?

♪ To be loved... ♪

Hey, you know something?

And heavy lies the head that wears the crown.

That's Italian for "mack daddy mentor."

JAFFE JOFFER (over TV): This is ZNN.

Everything that I have done for him,

I must say, you are more like your father than I thought.

- ♪ Going up to that great ♪ - Remember what I told you.

and now she's gone.

You don't have to suck up to me anymore.

More like a crack house of God.

I'm going to die now.

Mm, Lisa, please. I'm getting it from everywhere.

- Uppity bitch say what? - What?

I shall bring Queens to Zamunda!

She is still the mother of my son.

the universe began.

- Oh? - (chuckles)

This the best house of God we could find

Your neighborhood seems to be thriving.

uh, remakes and-and sequels to old movies nobody asked for?

I shall wait here.

Y'all leaving? Does that mean "leave"?

("We Got the Moves" by Beau Young Prince playing)

Thank you for your kind words.

According to our ZNN source inside the palace,

Go to hell, you Western weasel!

And as far as Zamundan royalty is concerned,

I am Uncle Reem's friend.

♪ What's even the point? ♪

- ♪ From Zamunda ♪ - ♪ Ooh ♪

- Prince Lavelle. - General Izzi.

I know I look good.

does it concern my marriage to a suitor

(quiet, indistinct chatter)

All right, we gonna take this old-school now, okay?

It is so good to see you.

when the trapper spawns right in front of me

I only recently discov... (laughing)

LAVELLE: Hey! Come on, y'all!

We will teach you how to walk like a prince.

(Mirembe laughing)

Good morning, Tinashe.

♪ Said he's going up ♪

They got a seven-foot-five center.

when you make love, you need a flashlight.

I rather enjoyed being on fleek.

This happened before we even met.

His death would make me smile.

♪ Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey-hey ♪

♪ And we tight just like birds of a feather ♪

It's rush hour surge pricing.

♪ Hey, hey ♪

♪ I got Sexual Chocolate with me ♪

So, you still got that smooth... scepter? (chuckles)

Here, in this hall,

It shall be glorious.

came to be with a single purpose:

Take me to the Church of the Holy Jubilation.

♪ We got the moves ♪

(thunder crashes)

Gentlemen, I have no time for this.

and sexist men of the cloth

I think he was supposed to be, like,

Well, there was a small off-campus library.

- Nonsense. - (Izzi chuckles)

and cut your own damn hair from now on.

"Pack-a-quando," "Pack-a-mondo."

- Ew. - Joffer Joffer.

My son has returned to Queens.

Mm, a makeover.

Princesses can be written off just as much as anyone.

The royal artist made a sketch of my vision.

Children, I would love for you to meet your brother.

I'm not hopping on some plane,

I did not exactly lie to you.

of trimming your most precious hairs.

People didn't even have sex anymore.

Uh, what's-what's, uh... umbajuntoo?