Tasty Mystery Baskets of Clips

and your father wasn't listening.

Abe, get the bags.

that's either rusty pipes or a golem.

I saw your set.

Well, you were planning to memorize your lines anyway,

♪ And from the way ♪

I send home the money.

We just finished our first paper.

- and I called a man a putz. - I wasn't there for that part.

- Shirley? - I don't want people to think I have a maid.

You should be looking at the ideas.

I've got a pool. They bring me towels.

I don't have my eye on anyone.

- Who was that? - Plumber.

-Pardon me? -Newlyweds. -They scream, too.

- Come on, Susie. - Save yourself!

He doesn't remember; it happens.

Keep go... Oh, wait, you passed it.

Yes, but now I don't want to.

Oh, no first-time fuckers.

Remember the face!

vegetable soup...

I thought you were Alan's girlfriend.

- Oh. - Maisel and Myerson.

- Rhoda. - Scheherazade.

Beer's in the bathtub, booze is on the sill.

Well, you didn't.

♪ Who knew one kiss ♪

You know very well, you son of a bitch.

of a mother never taught me, okay?

- Anything else? - Yes, do you have

And what would he do?

Stop saying "fuck"!

I don't believe that.

there... already,

Like, the judge says:

And, uh, it goes a little something... like this.

We're gonna dance.

No one's listening to me. No one respects me.

Sometimes I wish you would. Sometimes I think,

All you need is a social disease,

Really, take your time.

Gin martini, up, with olives.

For one, what's-his-face, the director, hates me.

almost as much as I love myself.

I promised you I wouldn't talk about her.

I like a nice loose tush.

I don't think...

and you are officially a road comic.

All right. This is exactly what I'm talking about.

He's the piano tuner.

Okay, well, here's the skinny on one-night stands.

The evening is going swimmingly so far.

on one of my lines, and he said stand.

What didn't you order?

I'll shove a matchbook cover in the door for an easier getaway.

That was the intent.

and then tomorrow you'll come to my show,

♪ And it's something ♪